Sunday, August 27, 2006

Why Mirrors Were Invented

Remember how I was going to bring my car in at 7 am a while ago? Yeah, that did not happen. I am incapable of being up and ready to go at 6:40 in order to have my car at the car place by 7 am.

So I rescheduled for last Friday morning at 7 am. Because just because I am incapable of having my car at the car place by 7 am does not mean that I won't keep trying.

On Friday morning, I set my alarm for 5:45 am. I actually got out of bed at 6:30 am. I took a shower, put on clothes, put on shoes, and left. I got to the car place at 7:20. Oops. At least I was kind of close to on time. My hair dried as I was waiting for my car, but I couldn't tell what it was looking like because the car place did not have a mirror in the waiting room. I also painted my toe nails while I was waiting, which is really not something fit for public consumption, but it had to be done, as I was wearing open-toed shoes. I did go into this kind of weird cubicle set up in the waiting room so that no one actually witnessed the toenail painting.

When my car was ready, I drove to the bus station and took the bus to work. I decided to walk to my office through the skyway, and a partner on the bonus committee (that's not really what it's called, but that committee decides the bonuses, so there you go) ended up walking with me, so we talked about the kind of random things you talk about with really senior people with whom you have nothing in common. I got to my office, sat down, and realized that my clothes did not match. My outfit did not coordinate AT ALL. My shirt did not go with my pants, and my shoes did not go with any of it. So that was awesome. The good news is that my hair turned out ok. But that means I will probably be tempted to try the whole air dry on the way to work method of getting ready again, and there is no guarantee of another successful air dry, so we may be headed towards future hair disasters.

Anyway, I was sitting in my office, trying to figure out how I could go heat up my lunch without anyone noticing my outfit, when my friend came into my office and asked if I was ready for the lunch meeting. I forgot that I had a meeting with a ton of coworkers and another member of the bonus committee. Why is it that I normally see zero people on this committee on a regular day, but when I look like a color blind freakazoid, I have to see TWO? And then I ran into a third committee member just walking down the hallway later that afternoon. There are only 10 people on this committee, and now three of them know I am a weirdo.

The moral of the story is: do not try to get car maintenance done before 8 am.


3carnations said...

That's great news! The bonus committee will decide to give you "a little extra" in hopes that you will get a personal fashion consultant to help you learn to match your outfits. Since you do not need a personal fashion consultant, you simply need to sleep later, you will sleep in and spend the money on new outfits. They will see the new outfits, assume the personal fashion consultant chose them for you, decide the extra bonus money was well spent, and perpetuate the greater bonus the following year so you can continue to afford the nonexistent personal fashion consultant.

All things for a reason...

Jenny said...

I agree with 3carnations. You don't dress in Chanel when your going to the welfare office, right?

Or at least, I don't.

schneids said...

I think this will go on your permanent lawyer record. They have a fashion file for these kinds of things. ;-)

boozie said...

A few years ago, I was going to take a trip to the beach. My parents were already there and I was going to drive my car with me and my brother in it to meet them. I needed an oil change and a tire rotation, so I figured I would take the car to the dealership at 8am and leave for the beach when they finished. However, the night before, my brother had a "parents are out of town" party at my mom's house and I ended up attending. I had planned on staying for a few hours and going back to my house to get a good night's sleep. Cut to 5am...I'm still up and still drinking. Cut to 11am the next day...I wake up in my underwear in my parents bed (alone, thankfully). Ever since then, I have not made an appointment before 2pm.

Yez said...

3C, that was the PERFECT comment!

And -R-, if Vincent could win a challenge, you must have been totally "fashion forward."

don't call me MA'AM said...

I am so impressed that you were able to do ALL of that AND drive to the car place in around 40 minutes. It takes me an hour just to get out of the house. Alas, I don't have "blow dry" hair.

As for the mismatch, you were making a fashion statement. Go with it. Make it work. Carry on.

-R- said...

3carnations, that is a fabulous idea! I can't wait to get an imaginary fashion consultant.

Jenny, I am sure you only wear your Chanel on the right occasions, as do I of course.

Schneids, you are probably right. The committee was like, "Green pants? Really? Negative 5 points on her permanent record."

Boozie, I think you have the right idea. Unfortunately, I think I am a lot more responsible than I really am.

Yez, ha! I am sure Vincent would have loved my outfit.

Ma'am, thanks for channeling Tim Gunn for me!

Stinkypaw said...

That's a lesson I've learned, soooo this morning Hubby took my car in for some work - he's such a good guy!! he! he! he! ;-)

jes said...

Dude. I do this, too. Except I can't even blame taking my car in.

I think I'm going to have to start lining up my outfits at night, because it's obvious that mornings are just not the best time to be using my brain.