Sunday, April 30, 2006

*Not That There's Anything Wrong With That

Whenever my mom, my sister, and I get together, we end up discussing the Family Greatest Hits. We end up laughing so hard that we are crying because of the ridiculous things we have done so far in our lives. Last weekend was no different, when we were nearly weeping in a booth in a Thai restaurant in Manhattan, Kansas.

Two of the Hits:

My sister brought a guy home from college for Thanksgiving. They had only been dating a few weeks, but he lived relatively near us, so it wasn't too much of a big deal. But the kid was weird. He wouldn't eat anything but turkey during the Thanksgiving meal because he said he didn't eat carbs. Except then he ate half of a pumpkin pie. He was also obsessed with Jones Soda and mentioned it approximately 25 times during his visit. My sister ended up dumping him between Thanksgiving and Christmas. He later dropped out of college and attempted to start his own church. Last my sister heard, he was working at Radio Shack.

When I was in college, my sister told my mom that my roommate was actually my girlfriend and that we only slept in separate beds when my mom was visiting. The next time I saw my mom, she asked me if there was anything I wanted to tell her, and that she would support me and be there for me no matter what. Which was very nice, but I had no idea what she was talking about until I related the discussion to my sister who almost wet her pants because she was laughing so hard.

*Five cool points for getting that reference

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Some Things You Don't Know About Me

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things

It is still Wednesday here, but tough luck, people. It is time for thirteen things you did not know about me before you read this.

1. My husband is about 15 inches taller than me.
2. Dolly Parton songs make me cry. Not "9 to 5." But a lot of other ones. I can't help it. I don't even like other country music. I like some songs by the Dixie Chicks and Dolly Parton, and that's about it. So please quit searching my blog for "Kenny Chesney butt pictures." There are none of those here.
3. On my dad's side of the family, the thing to do is to give all your kids names that start with the same first initial. For some family members, that initial is W. I have an aunt Wanita. It is kind of Weird. But my parents are rebels, and my sister and I shockingly have names that do not start with the same letter.
4. I procrastinate A LOT. H and I had to drive to St. Paul on April 17th at 10 pm to send off our tax info.
5. I have tried to go by my full first name instead of my nickname, but it has never stuck.
6. I cannot remember a time when either of my parents ever called me by my full first name, even when I was in trouble.
7. I am judgmental about certain things. I hate when people are judgmental, but it is difficult not to be sometimes.
8. I am a hypocrite. See number 7.
9. I get to wear a sari in one of my best friend's weddings this summer, and I am really excited about it.
10. I bruise easily. On my honeymoon, I fell twice while hiking and also rode my bike into a building, so when we got back, it looked a little strange.
11. I like the word "shall." It is fun to say.
12. It usually takes me at least 30 minutes to fall asleep. And bonus fact: I am NOT a morning person.
13. I freaked out when Josh and Donna kissed the first time. JOSH AND DONNA KISSED, PEOPLE! And I kind of have a crush on Sam Seaborne. And Jim from "The Office."

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

My Hottie

A woman H works with is getting married, so she asked him about the photographer we used for our wedding. We loved our photographer, so H had nothing but great things to say about her. The coworker asked H if he would mind bringing in some of our proofs. H said he would. I was surprised H would be willing to lug all those photos in to work (although it was certainly nice of him), so I asked him about it. He said he wanted to bring the photos in "so the ladies could see how hot [he] was at our wedding." Now that is more like that H I know and love.

Edited to Add: Oh, wow, I am so sorry about the title of this post. I don't know what came over me.

Monday, April 24, 2006

I still have about an hour of work to do, and it is already after 9:30 pm, so I will just give you a quick taste of my weekend trip:

I got to see almost all the family members I was hoping to see.

My sister is a genius and is going to be the best animal cardiologist ever.

I met one of the most meticulous women ever.

I met someone's drunk aunt who told me about her love for ladybugs, spiders, and bees.

I am allergic to the state of Kansas.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

My Day in Numbers

2: minutes spent doing my hair this morning

0: seconds spent applying makeup

0: seconds spent putting in contacts (although I do like my glasses)

1.5: minutes spent literally sprinting to the bus stop in my high heels to catch the last bus

0: blisters received- yay!

0: number of times fallen while running - this is quite the success considering that I am the person who rode a bike into the side of a restaurant (on my honeymoon) - don't worry, I was ok

4: things I need to do tonight - 2 loads of laundry, download music onto ipod nano, pay bills, pack

1: ipod nano I will be borrowing from H for my plane ride tomorrow

50: songs I should put on the ipod so I don't have to listen to H's music

2: songs I should put on the ipod just for the sake of annoying H since he accused me of putting sucky music on it already - excuse me for grooving out to the Bangles Greatest Hits sometimes on my morning bus ride

0: songs I will actually have time to download

0: seconds of internet access I will have starting from Thursday evening through Sunday

nearly 2 million: dollars that Dick Cheney and his wife received as a tax refund

Monday, April 17, 2006

Public Service Announcements

1. At work, please do not take a newspaper with you to the bathroom. I really do not want to know whether or not you are on your way to poop.

2. When riding on the bus, please do not talk on your cell phone. And I thought this went without saying, but if you must talk on your cell phone, please do not use baby talk. Perhaps you think that because the seat next to you is empty, no one can hear you. Here's a surprise: if I am sitting right in front of you, I can hear every word of your conversation, which sounds like this: "Hewwo? I wuv you. After you pick me up at the bus stop, do you want to go for a walkie-walk?"

3. It is April. I think it is time to take your Christmas lights down.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Happy Easter!

In an attempt to impress you with my pseudo-domesticity, here is the bunny cake I made for Easter:

Although we usually subsist on chicken cooked on the George Foreman grill, Healthy Choice meals, and spaghetti, we went all out for Easter. Besides the cake, I made a ham and potato casserole and chocolate mousse. H made a green bean casserole.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

I Love the One About the Cannon

I got a text message from my (very cool) sister-in-law saying that she just met David Sedaris. She went to a reading by him, and he signed her book afterwards. He wrote, "[Sister-in-law], I'm so proud of you! David Sedaris."

Last year, H and I went to see Sarah Vowell when she did a book reading at the University of Minnesota on her book tour for Assassination Vacation. I love her reading style; she has impeccable timing.

After she read, Sarah (it seems weird to call her by her first name, but do I really need to call use both first and last name every time I refer to her? yes, I do) Vowell signed books for everyone who waited in line. I was embarrassed to ask her to sign the 4 books I had, so I made H get her to sign two, and then I had her sign two. (I brought Take the Cannoli and Partly Cloudy Patriot from home, and bought two copies of Assassination Vacation- one for myself and one for my friend's partner.)

As I inched towards the front of the line, I got increasingly nervous. First, I admire Sarah Vowell's writing and talent. Second, she is semi-famous. Third and most importantly, she has met Conan O'Brien and they seem like they are kind of friends. And she wasn't just signing books quietly. She was chatting with each and every person in line. What was I going to say when I got to the front of the line?! I broke out in a sweat. I was going to have to tell her my name when she signed my book, and she made fun of my name in one of her stories! She was going to think I was a loser! And the flop sweat did not really make me look any more cool.

H was the person in front of me in line. He asked Sarah Vowell to sign our books, and she asked about the people whose names she was writing, and she found out we were there together. I was blushing and sweaty. I am not sure why. I mean, I think Sarah Vowell is cool, but there was really no reason for me to freak out. I have no idea what I said to her, but it must not have been that awesome because we have, surprisingly, not stayed in touch since the book signing.

Monday, April 10, 2006

It's Not Like It Takes That Long

In order to get married in our church, H and I had to meet with a mentor couple from our church a couple of times. They were not much older than us, very laid back, and fun. One of the things we had to talk about was sex. Just briefly, but we had to talk about it. And it was awkward. We just had to discuss whether H and I were on the same page about sex or whether we had totally different expectations for our marriage.

The mentor couple squirmed in their seats a little when they brought up the topic. Basically, all they said was that sex is an important part of marriage, and you have to make time for each other. Then the woman said, "It's not like it takes that long to have sex anyway."

Her husband just looked down at the table and didn't say a word.


Sunday, April 09, 2006

Blogging the Weekend

This has been a really busy weekend! Friday night, H went out with some coworkers and called me to pick him up b/c he didn't feel like he should be driving. Unfortunately, there was no parking in all of downtown St. Paul because of a Kenny Chesney concert. I saw lots of Minnesotans dressed up like cowboys, which I found to be a little odd, but whatever. The women with two pounds of makeup and giant hair were even more odd. It brought back flashbacks of when I lived in Texas, where pounds of makeup and giant hair are de rigeur. (Not that all Texans look like that, but there is a reason for the phrase "Texas hair.") H's coworkers were very cool, and we ended up getting something to eat with a couple of them. I also got a parking ticket, although I was parked legally. I am still deciding whether it is worth fighting the $25.

Saturday morning, we went back into St. Paul for a community service project with our alumni group. (H and I graduated from the same law school.) We helped out at an elementary school: I painted and H moved heavy stuff around. One of the women I painted with was really cool, so it made the painting fun. She was also very hot, and one of our fellow alums apparently noticed, as he spent a lot of the morning trying to hit on her, in his subtle way. I don't know if he ended up getting her number or not.

Saturday night, I went to a book and wine party at a friend's house. Everyone brought a book and a bottle of wine, and we exchanged books and drank the wine. Everyone seemed to really like the wine I brought; it was gone really quickly. This and this is what I brought. I had a good time, and there is talk of getting together again in a month or two to re-exchange books.

This morning, H and I got up and went to church. It is Palm Sunday, so mass was a little longer than usual, but H and I were distracted by one of the cutest babies I have ever seen, who was sitting right in front of us. I am not usually that excited about babies, but this one was so adorable!

H and I went to Super-T after church to get groceries. I got distracted in the clothes section though, and H was really patient while I tried clothes on. I ended up getting a cute twinset, which sounds kind of old lady, but it is not, I swear! And the skirts I tried on were all too big for me, which made me happy (although I do really need some new skirts for work). If you have any suggestions on where to get cute skirts for work, please let me know!

We came home, and H grilled us some really good chicken, and now I am supposed to be working, but I cannot resist the call of the blog, even when I only have boring stuff to write. But I do have a ton to do, so I shall end abruptly right here.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Insert Clever Title Here

When I was younger, I was the worst goody-two-shoes you could imagine. I thought all my teachers were the most awesome people ever. (Until 5th grade. My 5th grade teacher was a little old mean lady who hated kids. Mrs. Virgilio. She was less than 5 feet tall, in high heels, which she wore every day. Her name was Minnie. Heh.)

When I was in fourth grade, someone in my class was being really annoying or dumb, and the teacher ending up saying, "Do you know what happens when you assume? You make an ass out of you and me."

I was SHOCKED and MORTIFIED! I could not believe that a teacher said ASS! I went home and told my mom, expecting her to call the principal immediately. Instead, my mom was totally nonplused. Her response was, "Oh." This was basically the biggest scandal in the history of my 9-year-old life, and my mom's response was, "Oh."

In first grade, the teacher wrote my name on the board because I was talking during a math lesson. But I was just helping the boy next to me who didn't understand what we were supposed to be doing. It was so unfair!!! I was near tears at the embarrassment of having my name on the board and the injustice of it all. I think getting your name on the board was some kind of warning, and then if you got a checkmark next to your name, something happened. Why did I think that was a punishment at the time?

Insert amusing conclusion here. I am having a hard day, guys, bear with me. And post some comments!

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

The Internet Nerd Herd

H was talking about my blog last night, and he said, "It seems like you get a lot of comments from the internet nerd herd."* At first, I thought he was just referring to anyone who had a blog. But then I realized he meant the FFMB. I love it though. I am going to refer to all bloggers as part of the Internet Nerd Herd.

So I have a question for you Internet Nerd Herd (or INH, as I feel we are close enough that I can call you by your nickname). Is commenting on the blogs of people you don't know a strange thing to do? I love when people comment on my blog! But when I post a comment on a stranger's blog, I feel kind of stalker-y. I don't know why. It's not like the person doesn't have a blog where they publish stories for the whole world to read! But I worry that the blogger will wonder, Who the heck is this person, and why the heck is she commenting on my blog?! Which, if that is what the blogger is thinking, I don't know why that matters. But tell me, INH, is there proper etiquette for commenting? And what is the rule for linking to other sites?

*To H, this really isn't an insult. He has nicknames for everyone and for my little sub-groups of friends. There are several reasons why I think I have to embrace the nerd label:

Your results:You are Spider-Man



Wonder Woman



Green Lantern

The Flash


Iron Man



You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

Pure Nerd
73 % Nerd, 8% Geek, 26% Dork
For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd.

The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful.


Monday, April 03, 2006

Woulda Coulda Shoulda

I should be working right now.
I would like to be watching the NCAA tournament right now.
But work is boring, and I don't care who wins the tournament, so I am writing instead.

I am already almost finished with Children of God Go Bowling. I read it during my bus ride to and from work, and then while I was riding my exercise bike tonight. The bus ride this morning was great. The bus was packed, and the boy sitting next to me brought his skateboard on the bus. It was unusual for a suburban commuter bus full of office workers. His jeans also had a skull and crossbones on the back label. I only know this because he almost hit me in the face with his butt when he was trying to get off the bus. Other than that, he was a good seatmate. My book made me laugh out loud twice, so he probably thought I was wacko because I was trying to stifle the laughs, and I may have snorted.

I asked my friend what kind of jeans had skulls on the label because I have no idea what the young kids are up to these days. I ended up having to tell my friend about my bus ride because she thought it was a bit odd that I would just suddenly ask her about skull jeans. My friend pointed out that it was surprising that I would describe a bus ride that ends with a butt in the face as "great." I guess great is a relative term.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Library Madness

H and I went to the library this afternoon, and I have to admit that I went a little crazy. So many books looked good, that I finally just had to stop myself and leave. The books I checked out are:

Sudden Rain by Maritta Wolff - This book sounds like real "literature" that will make me think.

Children of God Go Bowling by Shannon Olson - I read her first book, Welcome to My World , when I first moved to Minnesota almost two years ago (I can't believe have been here that long!) because she is a Minnesota author, and her stories take place in the suburbs of the Twin Cities. Then I remembered liking the book but couldn't remember its title or author, until I found Children of God... today.

The Only Good Think Anyone Has Ever Done by Sandra Newman - I am not sure why this peaked my interest, but it sounds good to me. My copy does not have the creepy baby on the cover that is on the cover of the linked copy.

Honeymoon: A Romantic Rampage by Amy Jenkins - The author is British, which brings a different sense of humor to the story, and it just seems like a fun, easy read.

Learning to Drive by Mary Hays - Another book that I just picked randomly that looks good.

I realize my descriptions are not very helpful, which is why I provided the links. Since I haven't read any of the books yet, I can't exactly summarize them. My search method of the library was looking on the top shelf because I feel like those books get picked less often since they are not at eye level. Yes, I am weird.

In other news, H and I frequently sing parts of this Halloween song from Saturday Night Live to each other. H found a link to the song yesterday, and I thought I would share. Be warned this is a video clip, and will start when you hit this link.

Finally, I had an issue with United Airlines, and I had to call customer service five times, and still did not get the issue resolved. In the end, I wrote a letter to the company asking for them to refund the $100 I was overcharged. On Friday, I got a coupon in the mail for $ off the next flight I book. We still have three flights to book for summer trips, so I am happy with the coupon. And I am excited that I actually got something for writing in to the company!

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Very Timely Post

Some pictures from the Sweet Sixteen last week: Boston College v. Villanova - At this point, both teams are out of the tournament, but I just finally got these pictures on Flickr.

I didn't upload all my pictures onto Flickr because I went a little crazy. I don't think the world really needs to see 80 million pictures of the scoreboard. I did get some really good action photos though, you just have to zoom in quite a bit in order to tell that they are really good action photos. I also got some good shots of this lady's crazy Florida vest. I think it is kind of cool that she is into the team enough that she knit her own vest, complete with buttons spelling out "FLORIDA" and a giant gator on the back though.