Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Baby, Baby

The stars are shining for you. And just like me, I'm sure that they adore you.

That was a little tune from Amy Grant for you. My first concert ever. Oh yeah. It was totally rockin'.

But anyway, it is time for a confession. (Telling you about my Amy Grant concert was apparently not enough.) I have been asked when H and I are going to have children. I have discussed this before, but what I have not told you is that I always act like H and I have no plans for babies. I act like, Maybe we'll have them, maybe we won't. But H and I have discussed when we would like to have kids, and we even have an idea of when we want to start trying. But I have never told anyone that before! I like to pretend that there has been no discussion of babies. I am a married woman. Why am I embarassed about this? But I am. And no, I will not tell you what the general timeline is. Even if I know you in real life. Especially if I know you in real life.

I have been also asked if H and I have picked out names for our non-existent future children. And I pretend like I think it is really weird that someone would pick out kid names when there are no kids in their near future. (Or are there? Wouldn't you like to know. But there aren't.) The truth is H and I totally have a boy name and a girl name picked out. We have had names picked out for YEARS. There has been some heavy negotiation involved because H was really set on one certain girl name: Abraxis. ABRAXIS. ABRAXIS. OMG, people. With the name Abraxis, our future hypothetical daughter would either become a Japanese anime freak or a household cleaner (like Comet). Over the past few years I have talked H out of this name, and we have chosen a name that I like. But I will not tell you what it is. H and I agreed that we wouldn't tell anyone, and then H told his whole family last Christmas what names we had picked. I gave him a look across the table, indicating that I was shooting imaginary death rays at him with my eyes, and his family smartly changed the subject and no one has mentioned the incident since.

My friend just had a baby last week, and in the pictures, the baby is so adorable. I just want to scoop her up and snuggle for hours. I am sad that my nephew is a little toddler now and is too busy running around like a baby Frankenstein (how does he run without bending his knees? It is so adorable) to snuggle with me. I am not experiencing any sort of baby fever, but even I (who never admits ANYTHING... except on my blog) must admit that baby cuddling looks fun.


Red said...

I think I applied to for a job at Abraxis once.

Libragirl said...

Abraxis was character on Charmed who tried to read the Book of Shadows backwards so the Charmed Ones would lose their powers.

And I can't believe I just admitted I knew that.

Lawyerish said...

Abraxis. Wow. Well, she would be in no danger of having the same name as everybody else in her class.

I always think it's kind of odd when people announce when they're trying to have a baby. Like, you're basically telling the world, "HEY! We're having lots of sex!" And...yeah. TMI.

guinnessgirl said...

OMG, Lawyerish, I totally agree! I think it is REALLY weird.

R, your commentary on Abraxis is hilarious! I dont' know about you, but I really hate it when people ask me when Wilman and I are going to start the baby factory up. Gah.

stefanie said...

I totally thought, all through those first few paragraphs, that you were telling us you are pregnant. I did keep reading, and I will take your word for it that you are not.

Abraxis?? What the hell? It sounds like a disease to me. And nobody should name their child after a disease. ("Hey, have you met my daughter, Rickets? Or her brother, Diabetes? We're thinking the next one we'll call Scurvy. Yeah, I always just liked the sound of it...")

OK, I will stop now. Sorry. I haven't had breakfast or coffee yet.

guinnessgirl said...

Oh, PS, I was always partial to "Sing Your Praise To The Lord". Ha. That was definitely during my super-Christian phase.

3carnations said...

We were a lot like you. We knew about 6 months before we began "trying" exactly when we would start trying. We told no one. We told no one at all (except my doctor) that I was pregnant until I hit the second trimester. We didn't choose names until I was pregnant. The girl name was easy to choose, for some reason we had trouble with the boy one. We did not find out if we were having a boy or girl. For some reason, we both felt we were having a girl. Luckily, we went ahead and chose a boy's name because we have a son. A wonderful son. We did not tell anyone the names ahead of time. To this day, no one knows what the girl name was.

Hubby's family tends to recycle names. There are 4 people within the extended family with his name. Repeats of a couple other names, including mine. My namesake was born while hubby and I were dating. According to my sister-in-law, she already had the name picked out and "Didn't know if I was a keeper." Apparently hubby had realized that I was a keeper, because we were on the verge of moving in together at that time.

Anyway, we chose unique-to-the-family names, but not uncommon names, by any means. First thing my mother in law said after our son was born and hubby told her the name - "Is that a family name?" Hubby's response "It is now."

Yikes. This is long enough to be a post on its own.

Sparkling Cipher said...

I gotta add mine...Abraxis, I think my dermatologist prescribed that for me once. :) It is an odd name.

I get the questions all the time, just me, not him, like he has nothing to do with us getting married or having children. Hello, he needs to be there. I can't do it alone. Not that any of it is anyone's business.

I so wish I had the nerve to be totally rude when responding to those questions.

schneids said...

Abraxis works great on getting out those tough stains on my bathtub. Really..??? Oh your H is a crazy one. Abraxis? ***shaking my head***

Hmm. Too bad that you do not know anyone in real life having a baby in say...March? You could cuddle it all you want. We will take baby cuddling reservations up to six months in advance.

princess slea said...

I thought of the Charmed episode with Abraxas too. My husband really wanted to name our daugther "Starla". That was NOT happening.

How about this a.grant ditty:
el shaddai, el shaddai
el elyon na adonia
age to age you're still the same
by the power of the name...

ah yes...the "super Christian" phase as GG put it.

one last note: kids are cuddly but once you've gone there, there is no going back. i love my kids but i do miss my irresponsible days too.

Christine said...

Dearest -R-,
I think you should totally name your daughter Abraxis, and we can time her birth with the birth of my boyfriend's son who he *really, really, really* wants to name Aristotle.

I think I shall go pick out wedding invitations for their inevitable union. Because really, Abraxis and Aristotle.

PreppyGirl said...

To me Abraxis sounds like one of those smooshed together couple names:
Brad & Angelina = Brangelina
Abraham & Alexis = Abraxis

And honestly, all I can imagine is the kids in school calling her "the Abraxis of Evil."

I can't really throw stones here. I named my daughter Kate so people would call us "Kate & Ali." I've watched one too many 80'sitcoms.

3carnations said...

Preppygirl, At least you didn't name your daughter and son Starsky and Hutch. That might be a bit excessive...

Yez said...

Abraxis sounds to me like paralysis of the lungs, which is kind of what I experienced when I read that H was serious about the name. Abraxial arrest! If you have twins, the other would have to be named Cyanosis.

stefanie said...

R, you are going to share all these Abraxis-related comments with H, right? Because really, if all of this mockery of the name doesn't sway him, clearly nothing will.

Nat said...

-R-, please convince H that Abraxis is a terrible name.

Unless of course, you grow to love it, in which case, it is a fine name, and not at all the sort of name that will make a child wish it had never been born.

PS) Guilty secret. I loved the video for Every Heartbeat. And Breath of Heaven gives me chillbumps, but dang, Amy Grant irritates me!

-R- said...

H is distraught that all of you hate his name suggestion!

But I am very happy, and each and every comment made me laugh. I feel so inadequate because all of your comments are much more funny than my original post.