Memories from Childhood

Thirteen Things 1. My dad throwing my sister and I in the air in the swimming pool, each of us trying to do silly poses in mid-air 2. My sister hiding our new puppy in different drawers and cupboards in the kitchen, then running to find my mom and ask, "Where's the puppy?" [My sister was only 3, and the dog was always found quickly! Also, I think this only happened a few times.] 3. Going to the Nutcracker every year with my mom 4. Taking a family trip to Palm Springs and eating strawberries the size of apples 5. My sister being afraid to hike on a mountain because she was afraid she would fall off the mountain somehow 6. My "best friend" in the first grade tricking me into flipping people off because I didn't know it was bad [Her trick was telling me that she couldn't raise her middle finger separately from her other fingers and asking me if I could do it.] 7. Watching the Macy's Day Parade march by on the street below while we watched from our hotel window 8. Singing along in the car to my mom's two cassette tapes: Kenny Rogers and Billy Joel 9. Watching salt water taffy being made every summer in York Beach, Maine 10. Staying in the ocean in Maine until my lips turned blue and my parents made me get out 11. My grandmother teaching me to play the card game War 12. Performing a gymnastics routine in first or second grade to the 80s version of "Lean on Me" 13. Getting to go to the used book store to buy new Bobbsey Twin books Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. TN Chick 2. EPH2810

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Word Nerd

I am so excited! Starting Monday, I am relinquishing my parking space for a metro pass. I shall now be taking either the bus or the light rail, or a combination of both, every day. I will be getting almost an extra hour and a half every day to read!

If you have any book recommendations, send them my way!

Elevator Escapade

This morning, I decided I really needed some coffee from the local shop next door to my office. So I got on the elevator to go down to the 1st floor, and this woman I had never seen before was already on the elevator. That is not an unusual occurrence, but what was strange was that but none of the buttons were pushed. I pressed the button for the 1st floor, but the elevator stopped at 21, and the other woman got off. Maybe the lights in the buttons for 21 on each side of the elevator were both out. Or maybe the elevator is just psychic and knew she wanted to get off. I don't know.

I got my mocha latte from the friendly hippies at the coffe shop. (Yes, I drink girly coffee. Deal with it.) When I got on the elevator to go back up, there were 3 other people with me. We pressed the buttons for 21, 24, 30, and 35. The elevator stopped at 21, and one guy got out. Then it stopped again at 35. What the heck? I just got out and took the stairs down to 30 because I was scared to try another elevator ride. If you don't hear from me again, it may be that I am just in the elevator at work, traveling randomly up and down in the building.

Don't Worry, Be Happy

As you may be able to tell from my last post, I am trying to be more positive!

The song "Don't Worry, Be Happy" reminds me of the music teacher I had in elementary school in New Jersey. Mr. Sibonjin. During the summers, he had a lounge act in Atlantic City. He taught us all kind of loungey songs like "Mack the Knife" and the song that goes, "Five foot two, eyes of blue, but oh what those five feet can do! Has anybody seen my girl?"

One semester, our concert was a tribute to Irving Berlin. We celebrated the 100th anniversary of his birth. Really, what 9-year-old doesn't need to know all the words to "Puttin' on the Ritz," "Cheek to Cheek," and "Easter Parade." I can't believe my parents sat through the whole thing. We ended with a rousing rendition of "God Bless America" that had the whole crowd standing. (I think it was because Mr. S made them.)

Perhaps you are wondering what all this has to do with Bobby McFerrin and his hit, "Don't Worry, Be Happy." We performed that in concert, as well as "Kokomo" by the Beach Boys.

Here is the problem: When I memorize a song, I can't forget it. So darn you, Mr. Sibonjin! Because of you I am a 26-year-old lounge singer in the shower every morning.

Things I Have to Look Forward To

Thirteen Things 1. Duke winning the NCAA national championship 2. Going to two of the Sweet Sixteen games tomorrow night 3. Wearing matching Adidas jogging suits with H (who is over a foot taller than me) and going to a party to support our favorite gubernatorial candidate - seriously 4. Going to Las Vegas in May with one of my best friends and three of her friends 5. Going to California to see a friend in June 6. Being in my friend's wedding in May 7. Being in another friend's wedding in July 8. Watching the fireworks on the 4th of July from H's aunt and uncle's amazing apartment in DC (overlooking the Potomac with a gorgeous view of the Washington Monument) 9. Seeing my sister get her white coat at her vet school's ceremony 10. Waking up with H every morning for the rest of my life (sorry, try not to vomit) 11. Attending my friend's book and wine party in a few weeks 12. Actually having a whole weekend to do whatever I want or nothing at all... in August 13. Seeing my uncle in April Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

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Today

When my alarm went off, I reset it for half an hour later.

I woke up an hour later because I had not reset my alarm, I had reset the time. Luckily, I was only running a half hour late. I actually made it to work only 15 minutes late.

I worked all day. It was boring. I took a break to complain about George's new "girlfriend" on Grey's Anatomy. She is not very attractive AT ALL. George could do so much better, and this upsets me. Yes, I know George is not a real person. What is your point?

I did more work. I brought work home and should be doing it right now.

As I was getting ready to go home, I called H 4 times (over the course of an hour and a half) thinking he had just not heard it ring the other times because he was in a different room than the phone. I started to call him a 5th time and realized he was at a meeting that I had just forgotten about. I hope he had his ringer off.

I stopped to pick up some Chinese food because I was feeling kind of fat today. I am about average weight, I think, but it was just one of those days where I looked in the mirror and wasn't happy. So I deal with that by eating some of the fattiest food I can get for some reason. What is your point?

At the Chinese restaurant, the (very petite) woman at the counter said, "Oh! You look so skinny!"

I said, "Thanks?" Yes, with the question mark. I don't know how to respond appropriately to things like this, not that I am told I look skinny very often. At my wedding, my friend started telling me how nice our reception was, and I started to tell him all the ways we saved money instead of just accepting the compliment. I can't help it. But that is not really related to this story. Sorry.

The woman asked, "Do you want eggsauce?"

I asked, "Excuse me?" because I had never heard of eggsauce before.

The woman asked, "Do you eggsauce?" while pumping her arms.

She was asking if I exercise. "Sometimes," I responded. Then I went home and fattened myself up.

I am feeling much happier now!

[Edited to add: And then I rode my exercise bike for 45 minutes. Woo hoo!]

Why Being a Lawyer is Odd

1. I feel the need to put disclaimers on everything, even this blog entry: This list applies mainly to the life of an attorney in private practice. Public practice is much different. Individual law practices will vary. See? Odd.

2. Most of my life is and will be documented in .1 hour increments.

3. I regularly think of six minutes as .1 hours.

4. I have to use the words "whereas," "heretofore," and "herein" almost every day.

5. Strangers occasionally tell me way too much about their personal lives, such as details of their divorces or their criminal backgrounds. It would be ok if they were clients, but it is weird when your hairdresser tells you about his misdemeanor conviction, or when your mechanic tells you about his divorce and asks you the best way to keep his wife from getting his assets. Or when you go to the U-Haul place to buy some boxes and the guy behind the counter starts telling you about his paternity tests, and you are just silently praying for the credit card transaction to go through quicker so you can escape. Hypothetically, of course.

March Madness

Conversations During the NCAA Tournament on Friday Night:

Me: Michigan State really loves the braided-hair look.
H: Yeah, they're like the Braid-y Bunch.
Me: Boooo.


Me: I like that guy's muscles, but I don't like his shooting.


H: UConn's having another 20 minute timeout.


Me: That guy (from George Mason) looks like a caricature of the '70s. [The same could be said of Adam Morrison.]


Both: A SIXTEEN IS BEATING A ONE!


H: [Censored] Now the One is winning.


Me: Oooo! That guy has umlauts!


Me: What's this Gumbel's name?
H: Greg. He and Bryant used to have a show together?
Me: Yeah?
H: They played bicycle cops.
Me: [Silence]
H: It was called "Gumbel to Gumbel."


Me: I'm glad Oral Roberts lost. Oral Roberts sucks.
H: [Pause] Are you making a joke about Oral Roberts and sucks?
Me: No, but it would be funny if I was!

Scary Movies

H and I have not been watching Lost. But H ordered Season 1 of the show from Blockbuster Online, and now he is hooked. I decided to watch some episodes with him on Sunday night. We watched 3 episodes, starting with the one where Claire and Charlie get kidnapped. Right now, Claire is still missing. While we were watching the show, I had to go switch laundry from the washer to the dryer, but I was too freaked out. I made H go to the laundry room with me so that The Others could not get me. Yes, I am 26 years old and was worried about The Others.

We Wear Short Shorts

When I was in London between college and law school, I bought this big poster at an art museum. I managed to keep it in good shape despite having to carry it across Europe, and when I got back to the U.S., I framed it so I could hang it in my living room.

I lived in an apartment at the time, and one of the other people who lived in the same building was an older Hispanic gentleman who enjoyed working out. At least, I think he enjoyed working out. Otherwise, he just hung out a lot in his super tight, super short shorts, tank top, and wrist bands for no real reason.

When I was carrying my newly framed poster into my apartment building, Ol' Shorty Shorts was coming out of the building.

"Nice picture!" he said.

But I didn't understand him, probably because I was focused on not looking below his waist, so I said, "What?"

"Nice picture!" he said again.

"You too!" I said, and ran inside as fast as I could while carrying a giant frame.

I retain my crown as the Queen of the Awkward Conversation.

My First Meme

1. Who was your first prom date?
When I was a junior in high school, I went with a guy who I was kind of friends with, and it was fun, although a little awkward. A few months later he started dating this girl who was my arch-nemesis. Am I the only one with a high school arch-nemesis? She was soooo annoying, but I had to be nice to her because we were on the debate team together. She once said to me, "I used to think you were a total bitch, but now you seem ok." Ummm, thanks?

2. Who was your first roommate?
Between my junior and senior years of high school, I went to a writing camp in Tennessee, and I had two roommates. Monica tried really hard to be cool, and listened to the same tape every morning when she got ready. The tape had several songs by the Monkees and also "Wonderwall" by Oasis (which I still know all the words to). My other roommate would stay out all night, and then sleep from 9 am until dinner. I don't think we spoke the entire two or three weeks we were roommates.

3. What was your first alcoholic beverage?
The first time I ever got drunk, I was drinking beer during my freshman year of college. And I think it was Keystone Light or something equally horrible.

4. What was your first job?
I babysat in middle school. I was not a good babysitter. One time I gave this 18 month old kid Pepsi, and then she threw up all over the white carpet. I freaked out and called the parents on their beeper. I had no idea how a beeper worked though. There was a message like, "Hi, this is Mr. Kid's Dad. Please leave your number." Then there was a beep and I didn't know what to do, so I hung up. I think that was the only time I ever had to call a beeper, so I still really don't know how they work. Anyway, the dad figured out I was the one who called, and when I told him what happened, he just started laughing. They even had me babysit after that. I also called the girl Brittany the whole first time I babysat her, but when I put her to bed, there was a really big sign that said "Bethany" above her crib. Oops.

5. What was your first car?
A 1995/6 Hyundai Accent. My sister called it the bubble car.

6. When did you go to your first funeral?
When I was 5, my grandma passed away. I don't really remember the actual funeral; I remember more of the hospital.

7. How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown?
I had just turned 18 when I moved to another state to go to college. It was scary but I am so glad I did it.

8. Who was your first grade teacher?
Mrs. Burke. She had red hair and was pregnant, so we had a substitute for several months. (The sub was due to the pregnancy, not the red hair).

9. Where did you go on your first airplane ride?
I was a baby when my parents took me on a plane to see my grandparents.

10. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was it with?
I never snuck out of my house when I was growing up. I was a nerd, and I was also allowed to go out pretty much whenever I wanted (because I was a nerd).

11. Who was your first Best Friend and are you still friends with them?
My first best friend was my neighbor when I lived in Kansas. We were probably 4 when we met. Her name was Beth. We didn't stay in touch after I moved to a new state when I was 8. I saw her again when I was 10, and we got along ok, but I was kind of glad I didn't have to hang out with her for more than a few hours. When I was visiting her, her older brother was just hanging around in tighty whiteys. Who does that when they know people are coming over?

12. Where did you live the first time you moved out of your parents’ house?
I lived in an all-girls dorm. Quite a change, considering I had my own bathroom at my parents' house.

13. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day?
My husband. I have lots of friends I could call too, but I would call my husband first. After a bad day, he always offers to have dinner waiting for me when I come home.

14. Whose wedding were you in the first time you were a bridesmaid or a groomsman?
I have never been a bridesmaid before. But I am a bridesmaid in two weddings this summer, which I am looking forward to. I imagine it will entail a lot of running around and hand holding, but I can't wait to celebrate my friends' weddings with them. And one of them is a Hindu ceremony, so I get to wear a sari!

15. What is the first thing you do in the morning?
Hit snooze about 10 times.

16. What was the first concert you attended?
Nerd Alert: Amy Grant in the 7th grade. "Baby, baby..."

17. First tattoo or piercing!
I pierced my ears when I was in second grade, but they got infected. Gross but true. I repierced them in high school. I also have a little scar on my nose that makes it look like I used to have my nose pierced, and perhaps I have told some people before that I did used to have my nose pierced and it totally impressed that person, which is stupid b/c it is just a (fake) nose piercing.

18. First celebrity crush?
In high school, I was SOOOO in love with Christian Bale. He is still quite hot, although I don't have pictures of him in my locker anymore. Only because the other ladies at the gym would be so jealous of my locker pictures.

19. First crush?
I had a crush on my neighbor, Scott, when I was in elementary school. He was almost two years older than me, but he was in my grade because his parents held him back so that he would be better than the other kids in sports. Yikes. In kindergarten, we had to write out our addresses, and he didn't know his, so I told him. And I got in trouble for cheating. I was just trying to be helpful!

20. First real love?
My husband. I dated other people before, but I was never really in love until I met H.

If your nose itches, it means someone is thinking about you.

For Lent, I gave up gossiping. I should say, I tried to give up gossiping.

For the purposes of Lent, I defined gossiping as saying anything about someone that I would not say to directly to that person. I realize this is a bit broader than gossiping, but that is how I am defining it in this context.

I did really well for about the first five days. I was congratulating myself in my head all the time. Great job not gossiping! Look- that person did something really creepy, and you aren't even going to tell anyone about it! Those two people from work went out for "drinks," and you didn't even tell your husband! Way to go!

And then all of a sudden, I fell off the wagon. I think it started when I was having a rough time at work dealing with someone. And when it was getting really bad, this woman at work offered to take me out for coffee just to see how things were going. And I just started complaining about this person, and I could not stop. I was telling things that were true, but should not have been shared, especially with another coworker. Since then, I have been gossiping. Not all day, not all the time, but it has been happening. It is so embarrassing to realize how much I talk about people behind their backs. I am back to non-gossiping as of right now, and I hope I can make it until Easter.

Get Out the Vote

I went to my precinct caucus on Tuesday. I was elected the associate precinct chair of my precinct. Oh, the power! It was a really tough election, considering that there were only six people from my precinct who were there, and I was the only one who offered to do it.

So what is the associate precinct chair, you ask. My answer is that I don't know. I think I might have to go to a meeting or two at some point and talk about organizing something in my precinct. Obviously, there were not a lot of prerequisites for this position, like knowing what the heck the position entails!

Sister, Sister

My sister and two of her friends are staying at my house tonight. They are loud but fun. They really make me miss being in school. Working sucks. I am drunk, yet I am going to post this anyway.

'Cause It's All About Control

I was able to control myself in the elevator today, and I didn't say anything odd. However, I did get off the elevator on the wrong floor, but the elevator was too crowded anyway, so I just took the stairs the rest of the way.

In other news, remember how I liked the security guards I used to see every day? Apparently, the store has fired all of them, or they are all on strike, because there haven't been any guards on duty for at least two weeks. I used to entertain myself (slightly) by guessing whether it would be The Mullet or the Hot Young Guy who was on duty that morning, but now my mornings are that much more boring because every day it is just the store manager lady doing a half-ass job of watching people.

On my trip, I read Snowed In by Christina Bartolomeo and Small Town Odds by Jason Headley. I tried to read What's the Matter with Kansas? but I just could not get past the first two chapters, so I returned it to the library. I really want to read it though, so I will have to try it again sometime. On Bill Clinton's website, H found a list of books Bill Clinton recommends reading, so H is trying to work his way through those. He has already read two and really enjoyed them.

Six Months Later

We have been living in our house for almost six months now, and we just finally organized our office this weekend. You can actually see the floor now! Who knew this room was so big?

This morning, I was on the elevator in my office building with four men, all attorneys. Two of the men work in more of a casual office and were wearing long-sleeved button-up plaid shirts. They were joking about what would happen if they wore the same plaid shirt one day, and a third guy butted in and said, "It would be so embarrassing to be caught wearing the same shirt as another male attorney!" So I butted in with, "Not as embarrassing as it would be to be caught wearing the same shirt as a female attorney." And then they all just looked at me. But Guy #1 started laughing, and then they all laughed.

Another time, I was on the elevator alone with the hiring partner of the law firm. We started chatting, and he told me that he was on his way home to see his son's basketball game. I asked what grade his son was, and he told me his son was in fourth grade. I said, "So not much dunking yet?" He paused for a second, and then started laughing really hard (with me, not at me, I might add). I am thinking if my job doesn't work out, I will have to write a book of strange things to say on the elevator.

Cool Runner

When I was in college, I decided to go running with some girls from my dorm. Why did I think this would be a good idea? I HATE running, and I am not good at it. Also, I wore glasses at the time. I knew if I ran while wearing my glasses, the glasses would be sliding off my nose the whole time, so I left them in my room. Yes, I decided running while nearly blind was a reasonable plan.

So we started running. I did my best to keep up with my friends, but it was a struggle. We were almost back to the dorm, when we had to cross through a four-way traffic stop. Of course, there was lots of traffic. One of the cars at the stop as we approached was a convertible full of boys our age. I was embarrassed because my face was bright red, I was panting heavily, and I was sweaty. As I crossed the street in front of the convertible, I misjudged the curb since I was half-blind without my glasses, and I wiped out. I got right back up as though maybe they didn't notice some crazy girl falling down in the street right in front of them. The boys all started laughing, and I just kept running like nothing had happened. My friends were all running right in front of me, so they didn't see me fall. When we got back to the dorm, they noticed my scraped up knees, so I had to tell them what had happened. They never asked me to run with them again.*






*I hope that doesn't sound like a sad ending. I am still friends with them; they just know better than to ask me to voluntarily go running!